In a few hours my oldest daughter and I will be attending a calling hours for an 18 year old girl that died on Thanksgiving in a car wreck. Actually, I am debating whether or not to go with C. as she is meeting other cheerleaders there. She is a cheerleader with the sister of the victim.
I am not close with the family and have only spoken with the mother a few times. My best friend died in a car accident when we were 16 and this brings that back. I don't know if I can go or not. I am afraid I will start crying.
My heart is breaking for this girls family. How devastating, horrible and unfair it is to lose your 18 year old daughter. I don't know if I could go on.
I told C. that this would be different than any other calling hours she had ever been to. She has only attended 2 that she remembers and these were for very old relatives. Not to say their deaths were not sad but they were in their eighties. It is different when it is an 18 year old. Just saying that makes me shake.
This isn't money related but it's consuming my thoughts this afternoon so I just needed to get it out.
Tragic day
December 1st, 2008 at 07:04 pm
December 1st, 2008 at 07:10 pm 1228158649
Sadness beyond words is all that I can think of right now. Prayers for the family. We should all love our families more and worry about money less.
December 1st, 2008 at 07:12 pm 1228158737
My recommendation is to go to it. I would also sit with you daughter and tell her about your friend and how this death is bringing up those emotions. I would also share the fear and anxiety you feel.
I would also look at this as a teaching moment. Everyone has fear and anxiety in their lives. The question is what we do.
I am just writing what I feel I would do. There is no wrong answer. But I do feel you should do what is right which may be different then what I wrote. And I only ask, what would the ideal, perfect you do in this situation?
Good luck.
December 1st, 2008 at 07:15 pm 1228158934
If you decide to go, don't worry about crying. You won't be the only one... the family needs all the love and support they can get.
December 1st, 2008 at 07:58 pm 1228161524
December 1st, 2008 at 08:11 pm 1228162280
While your daughter will be surrounded by friends, she might need you nearby...
And, yes, about the old people who die...they lived full lives, and, to a certain extent we consider it "a law of life" that they will go before us... certainly noone expects young people to die... it happens every day, but it always takes us by surprise!
((hugs))
December 1st, 2008 at 08:28 pm 1228163284
December 1st, 2008 at 08:54 pm 1228164853
December 1st, 2008 at 09:55 pm 1228168555
I lost several friends in highschool. All were senseless accidents, except for one illness. I too think of them whenever I hear of a teen in an accident.
Your daughter may need you there with her. Also, it means a lot to the family to know that people do care enough to come pay their respects.