Ms. Pearl's Journey to Living Frugally

As another example as to how disorganized we were with our finances I have discovered that I have not accounted for DH's raise he received at least 6 months ago. It amounts to 251.00 per month increase!

This miss on my part further validates my complete ignorance and atrocious concept of budgeting. 251.00 per month is a lot of money in my world.

How did this happen?

DH receives one big pay every two weeks that includes his regular salary and his expenses. I was deducting his salary pre-raise and automatically transferring what was left (what I thought was all expenses) to his checking account to pay his AMEX.

Yes, he receives a paystub but we are both too stupid to pay close attention to it...yes we were that stupid. Amazing isn't it? Anyway, I think he must have somehow assumed that extra 125.00 per pay was his gas mileage. Also, we sometimes put personal expenses on AMEX so I think he thought maybe that money was for that?

Well, any "extra" he has been using to buy tools and things like that for his truck. Did he make an honest mistake? Absolutely. Some months his checking account was even overdrawn because we were charging so much to the AMEX and forgetting to budget for it.

Is this making sense?

Well, now that we are unraveling this tangled mess we call our finances, we are seeing so many things we never did in the past.

I am realizing that I never accounted for the girls lunches and all the misc. games we go to. Plus, DH's gas when he is home, and he has been working from home a lot more than he used to thus using more gas.

So, we now have 251.00 more every month to work into the budget!!! I almost screamed tonight when I realized it. DH and I worked for 2 long hours on our budget and I worked an extra 2 hours planning through March 2009. Of course, until March we will not truly feel the effects of this extra money because of paying for Christmas and his new tires which the money will come due on February 16th.

But after that... After that the braces will be paid off +200.00, the car will be paid off +310 and of course the +251.00

Total: 761.00

Nice. Major money to put to the credit cards. However, I will never count on any plan working out in this economy so I will just say lots of prayers!

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I am continuing my long drawn out quest to organize the laundry/clothes. The girls are coming along well but I haven't really started for myself. Luckily, I don't have many clothes but I NEED to organized our walk in closet and that starts with ripping up the nasty pee carpet!

C.'s fingers are doing better. We find out if they are broken tomorrow. I have a feeling they might be. Luckily it isn't a bad break like an arm or leg, wrist or ankle!

We have ZERO grocery money for the week and I have 20.00 for the girls lunches. I That leaves me 2.00 short but I can scrounge for change. As far as food, we should be covered with what we have in the house until Wednesday. So that means finding money for two meals (Wed. and Thurs.) I have a free turkey gift certificate from work that I haven't cashed in yet so guess what we will be eating Wed. and Thur.! TURKEY!!

I now have about 300.00 on savings 1 but I DO NOT WANT TO TOUCH IT! Some of it will pay the Christmas AMEX bill anyway.

So, my big challenge for the week will be surviving with 10.00 gas money and nothing else. I have a full tank but have lots of driving this week and will definitely use the 10.00

Can I do this? We will see.

Just got off work though you can hardly call what I did today "work." It was very slow, I didn't even call the Dr. once. I did however, go online and print out some vegan receipes to make this week. I also clipped coupons from the sunday paper and made my meal plan and grocery list. I guess that is kind of rotten of me as an employee. BUT, I have days there that I don't ever get a break and run run run so I will try not to feel too guilty about today.

Tomorrow I have my company christmas dinner at a very yummy Amish restaurant where they serve family style (all you can eat) chicken, roast beef, mashed potatoes, noodles, dressing etc...along with pie for dessert. Unfortunately, we are only allowed to bring one guest. M. is having his brother and friend over to watch the Browns lose so I am taking C. E. said she didn't want to go. If they both wanted to go I was going to flip a coin!

Anyway, that means a free meal for me but M. is cooking a huge batch of beef vegetable soup. Half of it will be vegan with using the crumblers. I think we might have to eat it two days in a row because the grocery money is almost gone! I spent 90.00 yesterday and I bought too many snacks and also had to get a lot of household supplies like laundry detergent, soap, shampoo etc...plus the 20.00 cat food! We have to get special cat food because our one cat almost died from kidney stones a few years ago.

Sigh...once again it feels like we have to stretch our money to the point it might start shredding! What am I doing wrong? I budget 200.00 per week in cash to use for groceries, gas, lunch money and supplies. Is this not enough? How can it NOT be? jeez. I use coupons and shop sales but I still struggle every week.

I think having to spend almost 24.00 per week on the kids lunches might have a little to do with it. Plus, we have been spending about 20.00 per week to go to C. and E.'s games. I guess this has a lot to do with it. We are also making 2 suppers the majority of days because E. won't eat meat. M. and C. love meat so I feel stuck. I might start screaming soon!!

I am just FRUSTRATED! I would love for one week not to stress over MONEY.

Well, I guess that was my personal rant. At work there is a lot of drama occuring between 1st and 2nd shift. I normally work 3rd but I get report from the second shift RN and give report to the first shift LPN. They are NOT getting along. Most of the time I agree with the RN.

The LPN is MARRIED (though living seperate from husband and trying to complete a dissolution) and is dating our physician who is also the facility medical director.

They are not trying to hide things either. I like this LPN but things are getting out of control. She talks about their sex life loudly in front of everyone and brings in all the gifts he gives her like her 400.00 coach purse and EXTREMELY expensive Armani watch. But that is not the worst part. The worst part is that she tells me personal things about some of his patients at our local hospital.

Now, we live in a VERY small community where everyone knows everyone. She should NOT be telling me these things. Sometimes I try to change the subject really quick because she is basically breaking the law by telling me these things.

Well, since the Doc is her boyfriend and she is a rather new nurse anyway, she honestly thinks she runs our unit. As RN's both me and the 2nd shift nurse are technically her supervisors...but you would never know that. SHE runs the unit. Now, I really don't care too much because working at night we tend to do our own thing but it really bothers the other RN.

The latest thing LPN did was threaten two of the nursing assistants that work 2nd shift with termination and also made a derogatory remark about their nurse (the RN) She has absolutely no authority regarding their employment status. Also, I think it is really rude to demean another nurse in front of their aides.

So, you see, we have mega drama. And what I have just wrote about is the tip of the iceburg. What is hard is that I personally get along really well with both of these nurses. Yes, LPN does overstep her boundaries and is not acting professional right now but I can't help but like her. That doesn't mean I can't be irritated with her right? sigh...this is getting confusing.

Anyway, this post has run way too long. I think I will go to work and just do my job. And try to avoid all this drama. lol. Not really possible.

I went through some of C.'s clothes and found two almost brand new pair of hollister jeans that are one size too big so I am going to be giving them to one of my work friends daughter. She is 12. My friend (M.) has no money to get christmas presents for her kids. She just got her electric turned back on and she is struggling to fill her propane tank.

It's a funny thing about the pants because just the other day M. was telling me that most of her daughter's jeans are way too small. I had kind of forgotten about it until I was organizing all my laundry this week. I came across those two pair of jeans buried in the back of C.'s closet. Good thing I have been working on organizing the clothes.

Today she called me at work and was crying because she got their share-a-christmas package (local charity event) and all it contained was food. Not that she wasn't grateful for that, she was, but she thought it would also have a gift certificate for presents for her kids or actual presents.

She feels so bad she doesn't have anything for them to unwrap. I told her about the pants and she is going to wrap them up for her. I paid $40 each for those jeans and C. wore one of them ONCE and the other less than 5 times because I bought them too big. I am so glad they are going to someone who will use them! I am sure this girl has never had a pair of Hollister jeans in her lifetime. I know they will be appreciated.

I would love to find some more things I can give her...hopefully tomorrow. I would also like to buy them something. We'll see.

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After work I cleaned the kitchen then went grocery shopping at Walmart. I spent 90.00 and had 3.90 coupon savings. My best deal was green giant vegetable steamers. Walmart had them on sale for 1.00 and I had a .50 off coupon so I got them for fifty cents!

I also had to get cat food (20.00) so that was pretty expensive. We purchase cat food around twice a month.

Actually, I just woke up from a nap and I think I might go to bed within the next hour. I don't know why but I have been overwhelmingly exhausted the last couple of days. I don't feel sick, no fever, cough or anything just TIRED. So tired my whole body feels weak. I wonder if I need my thyroid medicine adjusted?

C. had to get an xray today of her two fingers. We will know Monday if there are fractures. For now I taped them really good. I guess that's one good thing about me being a nurse. I can tape possibly fractured fingers. I was surprised the doctors office didn't send her home with some finger splints but DH took her so he didn't ask. I wrap the two fingers seperately then wrap them to each other to stay as straight and immobile as possible. They look a lot better today. Not near as swollen. Maybe they aren't broken.

Right now I am under one of my favorite quilts with Max the beagle at my side.

2009 Goals
1. Build a $1,000 emergency fund

2. Pay off Gap, Newegg and Capital One

3. Plan meals every week

4. Get passports for the girls

5. Take a family vacation in June

6. Get a new sheet set for my bed

7. Have 5 nice bras that actually fit me

8. Get 4 new bed pillows

9. Put new floors in walk-in closet and master bedroom. (Rip out carpet and put down laminate)

10. Pay my bills on time!

Thought I would copy and paste this from my page just to make it more real. It is pretty simple and I think fairly "doable." The biggest one is probably the new floors in my bedroom. I blogged before that my cats peed on the walk in closet floor. I still need to rip that up! Since it is connected to the bedroom I think we will end up doing the entire bedroom. We have wood laminate in all the other bedrooms so we may as well put it in ours. I LOVE it in the other rooms. SO easy to take care of with animals!

It will be an expensive project but DH has done all the other rooms so other than the materials there will be no fee...just time. I can't wait to get it done.

I am at work now and get off at 3p. The day just can't go fast enough for me. When I get home I am going to clean and mop the kitchen and then I am going to have another relaxing lazy night! I have been having a lot of those lately!

M. got paid today. The mortgage is paid! I now have 266.00 in the emergency fund! Hopefully, I won't have to pull any out. I'm going to try real hard not to.

In other happy news, E. did her backhandspring on the mat by herself for the first time! I am so excited for her! Next step is getting the courage to do it on the gym floor for cheerleading. I can't wait!

Unfortunately, it looks like C. may have broken her finger last night. She fell doing a twist that she was not warmed up to do. It is swollen and very sore. We taped it and will visit the Dr. tomorrow morning.

I have two new pages in my sidebar. One is about savings and the other lists my 2009 goals. One of these is to build up a 1,000 emergency fund. I also would like to pay off 3 of my 6 credit cards. As soon as the braces and my car payment are gone I will have an extra 510.00 every month to devote to getting rid of those credit cards!

DH is one his way home from Chicago and it is snowy and cold here. E. has a friend over and they baked a chocolate cake. C. has a game tonight. It is over an hour away and I can't leave E. alone so I won't go. Plus, it is a little icy outside so I don't want to risk it. C. told me she didn't think she would be too emotionally traumatized if I didn't go tonight. (verbatim!)

I just took a 3.00 survey online. So far, I have 16.00 in survey money! yay!

Didn't do my weekly grocery shopping today. I haven't even showered. I just feel really tired and it is SO cold outside I just want to relax by the Christmas tree and watch movies. I will clean and shop and deal with reality tomorrow I guess. For now, I am going to enjoy a cozy Friday night at home.

My house is a mess. My disorganized state of being facilitates financial chaos. Right? I think it does. Where did I put the dentist bill that came in the mail yesterday? Not sure, I think the kitchen counter but it might still be in the car.

This is a problem and it is very hard for me to fix. Thankfully, (for the moment anyway) my home isn't too bad. I have been trying so hard to clean and get the laundry under control. I just wish I could snap my fingers and have a perfect house but I can't.

And there is that insidious expectation that follows me around in life and causes a lot of problems...perfection. I want everything to be perfect. I blogged about my disdain for confrontation. I think this is related to that.

When I look at my bedroom, I see a problem so insurmountable that instead of dealing with it I just shut the door. To clean the bedroom to my satisfaction would require inordinate amounts of time. Time that I do not have right now. But, my idea of cleaning probably differs from many others.

In my world cleaning the bedroom would mean moving all the furniture and vacuuming, cleaning floors. Wiping down all walls.(maybe painting) Washing windows inside and out. Washing curtains. Cleaning all dressers inside and out. Organizing every article of clothing per color/season/function. Having a perfectly made up bed with too many fancy pillows.

So, I envision that kind of cleaning and no wonder my head spins. How about I go and just pick up, make the bed and sweep. That would be a good start wouldn't it?

Maybe that needs to be my goal. Clean my bedroom and give myself a break. Things can't be perfect.

It must be some kind of Amish curse. I grew up among them and boy can they clean. I KNOW how to clean from them. BUT, they don't work outside the home and they have large nuclear families that pitch in and get all the work done in one day. I have plain old me.

I think my goal is to clean my bedroom not like an amish person but like a rational person. I would like to free up some mental energy and not have to worry about strangers sneaking into my bedroom and passing out.

I am not perfect. I am an estranged Lutheran who grew up with too many clean Amish women.

You will all be happy to know I went to another basketball game tonight. For E. I sat with DH for the 7th grade game but he had to leave so I was by myself for the 8th grade game. I made myself a little more presentable tonight and actually spoke to people. This is progress. I remembered what you told me...most people are there for their kids and aren't really paying attention to anything else.

I agree for the most part. Although, I did notice a woman on the husky side with a lot of her white thong showing.

But anyway.

Spent 8.00 at the game for tickets, program, hot dog, popcorn and gatorade. DH spent another 20.00 on dog food and 20.00 on gas. The money just keeps flying out it seems!

DH gets paid Friday and I have to remember to send the mortgage payment that is due on the 16th by tomorrow. This pay will go for the mortgage payment, equity loan and two misc. medical balances I need to pay off.

DH leaves for Chicago tomorrow morning. He is driving and it is around a 6 1/2 to 7 hour drive...but he drives fast. I don't know why he doesn't fly. My theory is that he gets a lot of gas mileage money and then he keeps what he doesn't use for gas and it is his play money. (For his big toy the truck )That is fine. He deserves it. He works his a** off. Yesterday was a 14 hour day for him.

Made tacos tonight. Used crumblers instead of hamburg so that was a lot more healthy than usual. Thanks to E. we eat healthier than we used to. I just wish it would start showing on my body!

C. asked me for a new pair of jeans tonight. She has 5 pair and one is kind of old. I am thinking about it. She is getting another pair for Christmas but jeans are a wardrobe staple. Who knows, maybe I am just rationalizing because it is a part of our clothes addiction. I am going to take a deep breath and think about it. If she gets them it won't be until Christmas break. In fact, maybe I will have her use part of her Christmas money to pay for them...that is fair right?

I am the middle of laundry hell. Piles of clothes abound like the appalachian foothills throughout my home! So far I have washed 6 loads and put away 5. #6 is in the dryer and #7 just got put in the washer. C. and E. both exclaimed, "We have clothes again! Underwear and socks!"

Tomorrow will be another busy day of errands, picking up prescriptions and going to the post office. In the evening is gymnastics. Oh well. I am off work so it's ok!

Have a good night everyone!!

I went to C.'s game. She is a freshman and cheers JV so I left at halftime of the varsity game. She never ended up needing any money and I felt self conscious. Of course, I had to see people I knew in highschool. My old Cheerleading coach, my old superintendent, teacher and another old friend.

They ALL stopped to talk to me and I couldn't have looked much worse. I had no makeup on. My hair had gotten wet from the rain walking into the school and I had on a very wrinkled (but clean) top. I was wearing thick white work socks that stuck out of my brown leather shoes like they were infused with radium!

But I did it! AND I was the only cheerleading mom (of the JV cheerleaders) that showed up! How sad! For real though, I have a lot of social anxiety. Sometimes I wonder if I have an actual disorder because I can actually feel my blood pressure rise and my stomach flip flop at the thought of being in a large crowd by myself.

But I shall acquiesce from these self-centered ramblings.

The JV got pummeled and the varsity lost by two points. A boy from our highschool got into trouble for drinking alcohol in the stands. Talk about representing your school.

I was really disappointed when two of the other sides cheerleaders came out and did a tumbling pass consisting of round-off double backhandspring tuck. The opposing student section went wild and started chanting (toward our student section) "You can't do that, you can't do that."

C. could do that kind of tumbling pass in her sleep and she actually did a round-off 5 backhandsprings back layout and an aerial during the jv game. But this was during the varsity game so she couldn't go back on the floor! I wish she would have done her full twist!!

Yikes, I get too competitive at times!

Well, I had to spend 6.00 to get into the game tonight but you know I didn't spend any money at the concession stand because I was glued to my seat lest I expose myself unnecessarily to even more people I hadn't seen in 10 years or so!

I feel guilty right now. I told C. we would come to her game tonight but we didn't go. It was an away basketball game. (she is a cheerleader) It was only 20 minutes away. I should have gone.

But, I didn't want to go by myself. M. is in the middle of an emergency with work and is still in his office. Hasn't even had time to take a shower today.

The main reason for not going?

I feel self-conscious going by myself, sitting by myself. I feel like a troll. Like a fat troll.

So now I am on the verge of tears because C. is by herself and I know she will be hungry and I didn't give her money for a snack. I feel like the world's worst mom right now.

Maybe I should just leave now. Hmmm..

I am way too emotional!

I made 2 casseroles tonight. A regular sized tator tot casserole with hamburg and a small tator tot with crumblers. (vegetarian meat sub) for E.

Gotta work tonight. I have plenty of time to sulk until then...and feel guilty.

And I am at work. On my lunch break of course...wouldn't want to waste company time.

It is a slow night tonight. Only 10 patients and they are all sleeping well. I am antsy about all the money I have spent recently but as long as I stay on track it should be alright.

I'm looking forward to my 3 days off. There is so much I want to do around the house. Of course there is no appt. to get to this week...I seem to only schedule those when I'm nearly comatose from sleep deprivation.

M. is headed to Chicago on Thursday and Friday. I'm going to miss him. I have finally gotten used to him being at home and now I don't want him to leave! Irony.
Just last week he was driving me crazy.

I have come up with a list of some things I need to get in the near future. These aren't exactly needs or wants...they exist somewhere in the nether regions I guess.

1. 2 bras (for myself)
2. 3 pair underwear
3. New queen sheet set for my bed.
4. 4 new bed pillows. (one for each member of the family. And then I will throw away 4 older ones.)
5. New pair of jeans (I have one pair that are way too big.)

Those are my top five for now. Of course I could name more things but these items are venturing closer to the needs list at the moment. Maybe each week I will get one item that way it won't seem like I am spending so much!

Well, I had blogged previously that I was going to gain 500.00 in credit card debt this month because my husband is ordering new tires for his truck.

It's not going to happen! The tires are still getting ordered but we plan on paying in cash by delaying the order until the 19th. Big huge relief. Still don't like spending almost a grand on tires but it's not an extravagance we can easily forgo.

My smallest cat, Nadine, knocked over the christmas tree last night. Broke 3 ornaments and the lights are all sloppy. Very upset with her. She is half siamese and is not the most loving girl in the world. Our most wild cat.

My spending througout the end of January is going to be tight and I will have to be extremely disciplined. This was a mega-expensive month for us. DH realizes this thankfully. We need to emphasize it to the kids even more though.

I have no idea what to make for supper tonight. Gotta go and think of something tasty.

Sunday turned into a minor spending frenzy. M. spent 21.00 at Buffalo Wild Wings watching the Browns get beat. E. spent 8.00 watching Twilight and C. spent 12.00 on a birthday present for her friend. Together, DH and I spent 85.00 at Best Buy and 55.00 at Lowes. The good news is our Christmas shopping is all done except for the Wii fit DH is ordering off Ebay tomorrow morning and a 25.00 Forever 21 order of Cami's, 2 scarves and shirt for C., E. and my cousin.

Then I have to wrap everything. I also have to put together my grandpa's present. I spent about 8.00 on a photo album for him and I am filling it with pics of all of us...all his grandkids and great-grandkids. All 5 of us!

Tomorrow is Monday and it is my "short week" at work. I work Monday and Tuesday and then I'm off for 3 days straight. My house is a mess so I am hoping to clean a lot this week.

Currently watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Pretty good.

oh! I forgot to add, Paid for Christmas 2008 ALL IN CASH. First time ever.

Total spent: $1,354

This does not represent true frugal living...I realize this. However, I have probably averaged spending between 3k and 4k on Christmas for the last several years. One of the major reasons my credit card debt is around 21k. It sickens me that I did this but I did. This is a good thing for me. Always room for improvement but I am happy with the results.

How long until doing an activity daily does it become a habit?

I have been increasing my "frugal factor" and watching my money/planning since the end of October when I started this blog. While I am nowhere near my ultimate goal of living frugally and my debt is still out of control, I wonder if my behaviors are changing?

Here is a quick rundown of my new behaviors:

1. I have gotten in the habit of using cash for all purchases.
Someday, perhaps I will be able to use my credit cards responsibly, but while they have these horribly high balances I know I can't use them. *(Emergency this month is necessitating utilizing appx. 500.00 on credit BUT I have gone through my bills and this will get paid off in January.)

2. I have organized my pantry/cupboards/refrigerator and they have stayed organized!
This is something of a miracle.

3. Together with my family, we have been planning out all our meals and the closest we come to "eating out" is frozen pizza from Walmart. (we love digiorno with the cheese in the crust)

4. I have my family involved in this process. Especially my husband. I feel like we are collaborators on this venture to rid ourselves of debt. He has been doing so awesome. He is even giving up his dream tires for his truck so we can save money.

Now, following are some things I want to change. Call this early musings on upcoming new year resolutions:

Have a designated place to put all my bills.
I am so bad about this. Half the time they stay in my bag and the other half they lay on the kitchen counter until I pay them. Need to fix this.

Organize my laundry.
This is something that is embarrassing but I am putting it out there. We live out of laundry baskets. The girls wear mismatching socks the majority of school days. They hunt for clean underwear daily. We need to get this under control NOW.

Get some kind of coupon organizing system. I may have to break down and buy something. I have coupons laying on the bottom of a side table in my living room. Yes, I have been using them but it looks a mess.

Clean my bedroom and finish ripping the carpet out of the walk in closet.
Organizing the laundry will solve a lot of this. The cats peed in our closet awhile back and despite cleaning the carpet with a cleaner at least 7 or 8 times it is still nasty and has a stain and it grosses me out!

So, that is all for now. I am slowly but surely working on a major list of 2009 goals and will post them soon.

Is that how the saying goes?

I took a step back today. Our credit card debt is going to increase by 500.00 this month. DH needs new tires for the truck and it is going to cost appx. 900.00. We can only gather about 400.00 in cash because we have Christmas and propane to buy. We will probably use all our Christmas money from our families to apply to this debt. We usually get around 200.00. sigh...just when you think you are getting ahead of things...

We thought perhaps we could last until January or February but the tires are nearly bald. I think I have mentioned before we live on the top of a hill and it is STEEP. Without this truck I cannot get to work and back home if it snows hard. I also cannot get the girls to and from school. Love my little Toyota but it's not great in the snow! Tonight it is snowing hard. First major snow this year for our area.

We bought our live tree today. Spent 58.00. I had budgeted 50.00 so went 8.00 over. Spent 2.50 and 1.00 on a few lights and hooks. The tree looks lovely. I will try to post some pics. later.

We used multicolored lights and red lights. It is a very tall tree and I know we have over 1,000 little lights on it! We took the small strand of white lights and wrapped it directly around the trunk so it looks like it is glowing from the inside. At least half our ornaments are homemade/homemade gifts. The rest I have collected throughout the years. I always visit pier one right after Christmas because they have such pretty sparkly ornaments marked way low.

Still have a few gifts to buy for E. C. is done! Her uggs arrived yesterday and her (free) IPOD is on its way. It is purple! I want one! We are "adopting" two animals from WWF. For 25.00 you get an adoption certificate, a pic of the animal and a stuffed animal. I think C. and E. will like that.

FIL and BIL are over tonight watching the Cavs game and eating vegan spaghetti, garlic bread and salad. MIL made homemade caramel corn and I have stuffed my face with it!

Have a nice weekend everybody.

Yesterday I had to be the "boss." I had to confront an employee who has been having job performance "issues." Not pleasant because I abhor playing the supervisor even though, technically, that is what I am.

Problem is, I would prefer everyone "like me." When I know someone is irritated with me I cannot stand it! But why?

This presents a major conflict with my job position. Working nights, I also have my own ward along with being building supervisor. We keep everything pretty low key but occassionally things come up that I have to address and I can hardly do it. I have no idea how to fix this. I don't want people to walk all over me yet I don't want to be the type of supervisor everyone dreads.

I just want to be liked. How is this money related? Well, I think this tendency bleeds into other aspects of my life. Like my children. I want them to be liked too. Hence the clothing and the grades and the sports. etc... I want them to always do the right thing so people will like them too.

Is this some kind of genetic defeciency? My grandmother is the same way but at the same time my mom is practically a hermit who could care less what people think of her. Maybe I am reacting to the way my mom raised me.

Maybe I need a counselor.

I just know yesterday was awful. Did I mention I also hate confrontation? Burying my head in the sand and pretending conflict and tension don't exist has always been another tendency of mine. This has exacerbated the horrid state of my finances. I used to be terrified to look at my credit card statements AND get my mail. So you know what I did? Nothing. I didn't get my mail and I didn't look at my statements until the mailbox door wouldn't shut and the phone kept ringing from bill collectors.

I have to get over this notion that life is like a happy cartoon. It's not. This is my dilemma I need to CONFRONT.

Thanks for listening to my ramblings.

I got paid today!

Amount= 1562.32
300.00 more than usual thanks to working the holiday!
So far I have paid my credit card and a partial payment to the gas company that supplies our propane. I will sit down and pay the rest of the bills sometime tomorrow.

On my way to work now. Spent about 20.00 today to get into the basketball game, popcorn and a frozen pizza for supper.

Thursday evening! Gotta work tonight and Friday and then I am off for two nights. Slept in 3 hour shifts today...two of them. Had to wake up at noon and take girls to Orthodontist. I have got to STOP scheduling appointments during my 4 day night shift stretch!! I don't know what is wrong with me!

Good news is that I only owe Mr. Metal Mouth $660. That means come March we are looking at an extra 200.00 per month to add to the unholy credit cards.

I can't wait for tomorrow night...C's first game against my alma mater. Should be fun.

I get paid tomorrow but get my paystub tonight when I go to work. I am hoping it has the extra Thanksgiving money on it!

DH is making pancakes and omelets...using what we have in the house. I have 1/4 tank gas left and that should be plenty to make it through Monday morning.

On Saturday afternoon when I wake from my slumber we will fetch our Christmas tree and do the whole tradition of decorating and dragging up the big plastic boxes of decorations from the basement. We are not putting up outside lights this year...I'm too cheap and DH is too lazy. I don't know, maybe we will tape a string around our front door. That's plenty easy and I can't imagine too taxing to the electric bill.

I'm going to waste some propane and take an exceptionally long, deep, hot bath tonight. Soak...

Spent appx. 16.00 today on cell phone charger, water and granola bar.

Yay! My insurance finally paid a $147 medical bill that I thought I needed to pay in full today. $147 more than I planned this month is a nice little cushion. I am just going to leave it in checking because we have a lot of bills this month between Christmas and paying for propane.

I get paid on Friday and it should include my extra money for working Thanksgiving. I have all my bills organized for this month so all I have to do is hit enter (internet) or write a check and pop it in the mail. I pay most of my bills online nowadays.


E. just called and is begging me to drive almost an hour so she doesn't have to ride the bus home from cheerleading at the basketball game. I do not want to do this but because I'm a sucker and feel guilty missing her game I'm going to go.

For supper we are having sloppy joes. Last night we ended up eating what we had in the house so I didn't need to go to town to buy spaghetti noodles! I was proud of DH for not complaining. We ended up having grilled cheese and soup from a can.

I officially have 45.00 left for the week in cash.(DH received 20.00 belated birthday money that he graciously applied to the household.) I spent 3.98 at Walmart at 2am last night for a chicken ceaser salad...tasy but expensive. I have almost a full tank of gas but now with driving far today and gymnastics tomorrow I will have to fill up as soon as I get paid on Friday...(most likely) I was trying to stretch that gas to last through the coming weekend but I don't think that will happen now!

I am also challenging myself to use what we have in the house the rest of the week and use as little of the 45.00 as possible. Tonight's supper is planned and all we need to do is get through tomorrow. I'm thinking omelets and pancakes for tomorrow.

I had been getting frustrated lately because it always seems I struggle to stretch my dollars, but then I realized I have not touched a credit card since the first week of September. That is three months of using CASH. In the three months I have seen my stress fall, my stomach aches have been way less frequent and I am sleeping better at night. (Or the day in my crazy night shift existence) Do we still struggle with debt? Absolutely. But having a plan makes such a difference.

Putting aside any modesty and self depracation, I am so proud of myself. This blog has helped in so many ways. It keeps me accountable and is a great venting tool. Thanks for listening all.

I had to admit that the last week or two I have been extremely disorgnized. Not with my money but with my house/car/belongings.

But everything sort of blends together doesn't it?

Because I never bothered organizing my coupons last weekend, I never made a shopping list, so I never went shopping for food except in those little quick spend too much trips...with the kids.

Now, it is Tuesday and I don't get paid until Friday and I have appx. $25 left for the rest of the week. This would be NO BIG DEAL but the husband is home so that means full out meals like his mommy used to cook him. (Excuse the sarcasm) But seriously! The girls and I could last all week without buying more food and we would not go hungry. But God forbid we actually use what we have in the house!

I had to get that out.

We have one jar of spaghetti sauce but no noodles so it looks like I will have to drive all the way to town for spaghetti noodles. Frustrating! He hasn't traveled in at least 2 weeks and it is starting to get to me. He is home ALL DAY LONG. Sits up there working in his office and just hearing him move sometimes makes me antsy.

I don't know why he is getting on my nerves so much but he is.

I'm edgy this week.

What a long, cold and sad day it has been. C. and I went to the calling hours. I guess people have more strength than they know. The girls parents were standing by the casket hugging, crying and talking to people as they passed by. They were playing the girls favorite songs, hip hop, pop, rock, and they had all sorts of scrapbooks and collages of her life.

C. did well. She is not one to cry in public but when she got in the car the tears came.

I didn't make supper tonight and my energy is low. I guess we will survive on cereal and ice cream tonight. Thank goodness I don't have to go to work until tomorrow. I hope my some of my energy returns by then.

I found 40 cents in the couch that I will add to my challenge money bringing the total to 68 cents. I might do a dance if I ever reach $1.

In a few hours my oldest daughter and I will be attending a calling hours for an 18 year old girl that died on Thanksgiving in a car wreck. Actually, I am debating whether or not to go with C. as she is meeting other cheerleaders there. She is a cheerleader with the sister of the victim.

I am not close with the family and have only spoken with the mother a few times. My best friend died in a car accident when we were 16 and this brings that back. I don't know if I can go or not. I am afraid I will start crying.

My heart is breaking for this girls family. How devastating, horrible and unfair it is to lose your 18 year old daughter. I don't know if I could go on.

I told C. that this would be different than any other calling hours she had ever been to. She has only attended 2 that she remembers and these were for very old relatives. Not to say their deaths were not sad but they were in their eighties. It is different when it is an 18 year old. Just saying that makes me shake.

This isn't money related but it's consuming my thoughts this afternoon so I just needed to get it out.

I worked 7am to 3pm today (Sunday.) Feels strange because I am used to working nights but they need an RN every other weekend on days so that is what I'm doing now. I got home and immediately hit the couch for a nap that turned into sleeping through the evening.

It is now 12am and I am AWAKE! E. had a 24 hour throwing up bug so I am holding my breath awaiting the potential first pangs of nausea in myself and C. and DH. Hopefully we all stay healthy.

She is feeling better now but still looks a little gray in the face and generally limp.

Thank goodness the girls are still on vacation tomorrow. That means we will all sleep in until at least 9am. They have hair appts. at 10am. I regret making them that early. It sounded good at the time but now I would prefer if we could all just stay in bed until 11.

We are definitely a night owl family! DH is still awake and watching Star Wars. He is lucky he can sleep in every day until 8 or 9 and then walk upstairs to start work in his pj's with the cat curled up beside him and the dog warming his feet. I envy that sometimes!

It is rather "mild" (for Ohio) tonight and it is 66 degrees in the house even though the thermostat is set at 65. I am very used to this temp. In fact, on Saturday morning I woke feeling warm and it was because the girls had turned the heat up to 70. Felt too hot!

I messed up this weekend and didn't do my weekly shopping trip. Of course we had extra kids most of the weekend that tore through all the food like cereal, milk and snacks. Love that the girls have so many friends but for such skinny people I can't believe how much they all eat!

Now I only have barely $40 until Friday in the food budget. We have enough laying around the house for at least 3 meals so we should be ok but we'll see how it goes with my picky eaters.

I filled my car up for $19.89 today. WOW. I still have $10 in the gas budget until Friday but I don't think I will need it so I will use that for food. I'm going to put 11 cents toward my challenge money. That raises my grand total to 28 cents. This is hard.

Well, gonna sign off for now even though I will probably be up for several more hours!

Went shopping yesterday and joined the ranks of the "black Friday" bargain hunter. I DID find some great bargains along with some wild people.

Probably the funniest thing I saw was a woman pushing a Target cart through Kohls. She made it to the inside of the store and was about to head down a main aisle but was stopped by some workers who told her she couldn't bring the Target cart inside. It was a strange scene. She had the cart piled full of Target bags.

The best part was the look of confusion she had on her face when they told her she had to turn around and leave the cart outside. My cousin and I had a pretty good laugh.

I am ALMOST finished with my Christmas shopping. Have to order the Wii fit from gamespot today, buy my grandpa and uncle a flashlight and my niece a game. DH is getting his dad a Lowes gift certificate and his mom a computer game and then guess what? WE ARE DONE! And it isn't even December!! yay!

The busiest 2 stores in the mall yesterday morning were
1. Charlotte Russe
2. American Eagle

I spent $67 in Charlotte Russe and got so much stuff I don't know where to start. You got 30% off your grand total plus the entire store was already on sale! Yeah, it isn't the most high quality clothing out there but for my girls, my cousin and my niece, it will be great because these are girls who tear through clothes at ridiculous speed.

I spent $85 at American Eagle where all tops and jewelry were buy one get one 50% off (even on sale items) and then another 25% off your grand total. I got a pair of clogs, 2 shirts, 2 necklaces and a pair of pants. For American Eagle this is pretty good.

The lines in American Eagle and Charlotte Russe were a good 45 minutes long.

After these two stores we checked out Hollister....boring and of course NOTHING on sale. There wasn't even much of a line. They need to consider offering better sales. Next we went to Aeropostale where I bought one item that E. wanted, a zip hoodie. It was cute but completely overpriced at almost $50. (and that was with a 50% discount!) I didnt find anything else in Aeropostale worth buying.

I visited Express and bought C. a pink scarf, black cardigan sweater and a beautiful camisole/tank. I had to argue with the cashier who insisted the stores 20% off the total was more than the 15$ gift certificate I had. It wasn't.

After leaving the mall we headed to Old Navy (second trip in a week) where I bought my cousin's present plus a winter coat for DH. I spent almost $50 on cousin's gift...had budgeted $15! But, I couldn't have gotten my shopping done without him. He patiently stood in lines for me while I shopped. He carried all my stuff etc...I honestly couldn't have done it without him so I wanted to get him something he really wanted. He picked out a thick zip hoodie/jacket and a scarf.

The last store we visited was Borders where I spent $50. Got E. hardback of the third twilight series book...can't remember the name, and got C. Uncle Tom's Cabin, a Jodi Picoult novel and Kurt Vonnegut's Breakfast of Champions.

We ate at Taco Bell before heading home and I spent $5. It was an expensive day but we had a blast and I did find some pretty good bargains...nothing too earth shattering but that's ok.

I have saved all my receipts this Christmas and am tracking my spending very carefully. So far, I have not used any credit cards...all cash. (Well, cash transferred to the checking account to pay the AMEX) My ultimate goal was to keep this year below $1000.00. I don't think that is going to happen because I have already spent $856 and still have another 150-200 dollars to go. Still, I am happy because in the last few years I have NEVER spent this little at Christmas and I have always put the majority of it on my credit card. So, this is progress.

Right now I am grappling with the temptation of adorable Juicy Couture earrings for E. and C. but so far I have resisted! I think I will save them for their birthday.

Well, that is all from the land of shopping. I had to work today and had a few stressful, cursing, delusional residents to deal with. Luckily, I was making rounds with the psychiatrist so he helped me defuse a potentially violent situation.

Well, him and some Haldol and Ativan!

DH is grilling in 40 degree weather tonight because I am too lazy and tired to even think about doing anything but sitting on the couch. Thank God for helpful husbands!

E. CLEANED her room. There are no dirty dishes with rotting milk, the carpet is cleaned and vacuumed and DH helped her move her furniture around. It looks awesome. Now we need to get C. to clean hers and we'll be in business.

I have an insanely busy week coming up. I have picked up quite a few hours to pay for all these presents!

In my last entry I was quite upset and frustrated regarding holiday spending. I am feeling a lot better for several reasons. First of all, at Thanksgiving today, we agreed with extended famiy there woud be no gift exchange this year...what is important is spending time together and overeating!

Secondly, my Aunt and I agreed to spend $10-$15 per person in our close family. (We usually spend $30-$40) This includes 7 people (2 cousins, Aunt, Uncle, Mom, Grandma and Grandpa)

DH and I agreed to a $20 limit on his parents and SIL and I agreed to $20 limit on each others kids. We will not exchange gifts with DH's side except for the $20 gifts for my two nieces that live close.

I will be giving Christmas cards and homemade cookies/candy to my aides at work. I have 4 close friends at work that I will spend $5 on them for something a little special.

This adds up to a grand total of: $225.00 at the MOST.

This is realistic. This also means my mom, aunt, grandma and cousins are done!

We sat down as a family and the girls both agreed that instead of buying/consuming more "stuff" they don't really need that we would be donating $25 each to the charity of their choice. (maybe $50 each...we'll see)They seemed genuinely excited to do this! I have already bought them a few gifts and I need to get them a couple more (E. especially) but this year will not be consumed with an overabundance of "stuff."

Anyway, I have already spent $405 on Christmas and it looks like I will spend appx. another $500. This will bring my grand total to just over $900.00. In the past 5 years I don't think I have EVER spent less than $3,000.00 for Christmas so this represents a major financial shift.

More than that however, I hope it represents a ideological/philosophical shift in that the true meaning of Christmas will finally emerge here at our little space in this grand universe.

I feel like I have gained a lot of perspective. There is definite freedom in simplicity. I am tired of running in circles to buy overpriced plastics. Yes, I truly enjoy giving thoughtful gifts to my family but it isn't necessary to go into major debt over it all.

Have a blessed holiday weekend everyone.

Let's start with the good news:

1.Max the dog is going to live.

2.The organization of bills/payment schedules for December is completed.

3.Tomorrow is eat large meals for free day. (And bring home leftovers)

4.I found my gift certificate for a free turkey.

Now the bad news.

1. New vet bill for Max is 35.00

2. December is going to be SUPER tight because of Christmas and I am STRESSING out!!

3. I have to bring a bottle of Kahlua to my Aunts tomorrow and I have no idea how much that will cost.

I could add more "bad" news but those are the 3 biggies for the day.

Did I mention I also am mad at my husband because I think he is acting like a spoiled baby??

Here is why: He has all these grand plans to buy C. and E. all these expensive gifts like a bunch of wii games, guitar hero, another DDR mat, Ipod, Nintendo DS. Now, when I total this up I come up with a very rough estimate of at least 500.00 (this is excluding the free Ipod using his AMEX points.)

I don't even think the girls want most of this stuff but DH thinks they do. C. wants mostly clothes and E. only truly wants ONE certain Wii game along with a few clothes. I think the girls are going along with their dad because it is their way of appeasing him.

I have no psychology degree but I think DH feels left out because the girls are older and he can't buy them toys etc... The things they want are things he knows only I can pick out for them. I feel kind of sad for him in a way because I know he wants to connect with the girls and this is the only way he knows how...buy them too much stuff.

So this is my dilemna. I am frustrated beyond belief right now and have no idea what to do to fix things. I am literally in tears.

He took C. to the movies and he was angry when he left because he wanted to go to Lowe's and Best Buy when C. and her friend were in the movies. But, he knows there is no money to do this. (I didn't bring it up, he just knows) But I pushed him over the edge because I yelled at him when he said he was going to take the truck that gets 12 mpg. (this trip will total 50 miles.)

So, now we are fighting, I feel bad we can't buy the girls all that DH wants. Oh, I just feel bad about everything! Debt sucks.

Why is Christmas shrouded in this ugly consumerism? It is like some gaudy nightmare!! It is like I am walking around hypnotized. I know in the logical part of my mind that if we don''t have the money than we just shouldn't buy it. And that Christmas is NOT about going into debt to buy too much stuff. But, the emotional part of my mind - my silly, misplaced, sentimental synapses are telling me that my daughters will wake up Christmas morning and be emotionally traumatized by not having a bunch of gifts to unwrap.

What do I do? I don't know. I just know I REFUSE to break out the credit cards. Isn't living in debt and stress just as traumatic to my girls as a few less presents at Christmas? I just want to stop crying over something so silly. There are people all over the world that would love to have a tiny fraction of what my family (and most americans) have. Yet, here I sit, heart pounding, stomach lurching. And for what? STUFF?

I think we need to have a family meeting tonight. We need to talk about materialism and how it can bankrupt both society and the soul.

I have decided to start my own "$20 challenge." Today I found 0.17$ on the ground so that will be my starting balance. This blog will allow me to track my balance. It will be interesting to see how much I can accumulate by December 31st.

Any found/unexpected funds will be applied to this challenge and deposited into my Savings Account. Yay! I'm kind of excited now!

My 10 hour shift flew by last night. I am not usually that busy working nights but I didn't mind the change of pace...kind of nice once in awhile.

Regarding my job, I am in pretty desperate need for some new nursing uniforms. I will probably check out Goodwill or another local thrift store. Still though, I am kind of yearning for a crisp NEW uniform...sigh, I will keep on dreaming!

They passed out gift certificates for a 10-12 pound turkey at work the other day and I can't find mine! Still need to work on my orgnaizational skills. Pretty sure it is somewhere around the house... We were going to cook it and make creamed turkey to freeze.


I wonder sometimes if I am too cocky about my job. I take it for granted that since I work in healthcare my job is recession proof...there is a nursing shortage too. But last night I was thinking what if they replaced me with an LPN who they can pay less? I don't think it will happen because the government requires a certain amount of RN "hours." But still...just a random worry.

I have put in my time in hospitals on crazy hectic med/surg floors and I really like the job I have now. It is 12 minutes from my house, relatively laid back and perfect for my life right now. I do not want to go back to the hospital at this point. Plus, I am a supervisor where I work and that gives me a little extra money I would lose if I had to go back to the hospital. Hopefully none of these worries will come to pass...don't think they will but best to prepare for the worst in this economy!

The checking account balance is holding up. The $350 surprise has saved me from having to dip further into my meager savings! Still, I feel good knowing I have some money available for mini-emergencies.

There is no gymnastics this week so that saves a lot of driving. In fact, I put $17 into my car last Friday and I still have almost half a tank left. If I'm careful I just might make it until Friday before I need more! I still have $20 in allotted cash for gas but I am hoping I don't need to use it! Gas prices where I live are averaging 1.65-1.75. Very nice. I just hope people don't go crazy with the suv's again.

Still getting retail coupons/discounts in the mail near daily. Latest is from Express in the form of take $30 off $75 purchase or $15 off $30 purchase through December. I'm debating if I should buy C.'s sweater at this store. I was going to do American Eagle or Hollister but she already has a bunch of clothes from these stores. Express seems a little more grown-up and she seems to be shifting her style here lately to more classic type clothing and less prepackaged trendy teen looks. I worry about her clothes obsession sometimes though and maybe I am feeding into it...but as long as she is ok with thrift store finds mixed in here and there I don't mind. I'm happy she doesn't want to do cookie cutter clothes...



...Haven't checked the markets yet. Do I really want to?

Well, it looks like it is true. I have $350.00 more in my checking account than I thought. On October 25th I had a withdrawal out of checking, when I balanced my account 2 weeks ago I must have subtracted it twice...or something like that!

Now, because of my financially challenged mind, I am TERRIFIED to touch this money. I just can't believe it is true. I am used to my checking account being LESS than I think not MORE.

What will I use this for? Bills of course. What else?

My thermostat is set at 65 today because DH is out. I am wondering however, if I should just leave it at a steady 67. Would that be better than turning it up and down all the time. I'm just not sure.

My homemade bread turned out pretty well. It was a little dense but the flavor was delicious. I used honey in place of sugar and that made it taste wonderful. We have gone through a loaf and a half already! I put 2 loaves in the freezer. I'll take one loaf to my Aunt's on Thanksgiving and I guess we will keep the other one here.

I was calculating the cost of making the bread and it came out to around 5.00, maybe a little less. That is what? 1.25/loaf? That is around the cheapest store brand white bread I can buy. This bread was a lot better and healthier than that so I'm happy. However, it was a lot of work and takes a lot of time.

I have decided to work tonight...boo. But I needed the money and an exra 10 hour shift will help a lot. Normally I work 8 hour shifts but they were desperate so I relented. My first pay in December should be awesome because I get paid double time for Thanksgiving plus I will have an extra 10 hours! yay!

I hate to sound like I love money so much. I really don't. I just want to wipe out my debt so I can work a little less but still save a lot more.

I have decided to go shopping on Friday. I have NEVER been shopping the day after Thanksgiving but I am off and I have to work the weekend plus 4 out of 5 days next week. I would like to finish up most of my shopping.

We have decided to cash in some of DH's AMEX points to get C. a new Ipod and E. a wii game. Yes, we were saving those points for vacation but it doesn't wipe them out completely and they get built up fairly quickly. Besides, it's like free money for Christmas presents...literally very free because those points are a result of DH's expenses (flights, hotels, equipment, meals etc...) that his company reimburses. Pretty good deal if you ask me!

Gotta go and hop in the shower, have a great day everyone.

Is how much I spent on my Christmas shopping trip yesterday. Went $105 over budget but it's ok because I am still well within my budget...I just was going to wait until after Thanksgiving to finish but I found so many good deals there was no way I could pass them up.

Plus, my VS and Bath and Body coupons expire Nov. 30th and I got new ones yesterday that are valid in December, although I don't really know if I need to use them...we'll see, I might give a gift to one of my friends.

I got A LOT of stuff. My bill at Bath and Body before all my discounts totalled appx. 90.00 but I only paid 48.00!! We had to do a few transactions but oh well. There was no line...hmmm, a sign of the failing economy? Actually, there were no lines anywhere. BTW, at Bath and Body their lotions, sprays, and body soaps are buy 3 get 2 free. Pretty good deal if you ask me! I got Wild Orchid for grandma and Midnight Pomegranate for my mom.

Paid full price (80.00) for Abercrombie jeans for C. She wears the Emma boot cut in 0s and of course there was nothing on sale. If I had a lot more money I could have gone wild in Abercrombie and Fitch. They seem to have grown up some. Not so many silly logo tees with A&F splashed across the front. C. doesn't do logo tees and that makes me HAPPY. For a 14 year old she has pretty classy taste!

I don't think I paid full price for ANYTHING in Old Navy where my total was 207.00. I bought myself a nice shirt for 7.99 and cute Khakis on sale. M. got 2 shirts for work. The rest were Christmas gifts for C. and E. scarves, hats, ballet flats and several shirts. A LOT OF STUFF for only 207.00. Oh, I think I paid full price for the scarves but it is something they do need for winter.

While at the cash register in Old Navy I had the cashier take away several items I had in my cart in order to keep my total low. She said a lot of people have been doing this.

At Victoria's Secret I paid $10 for two lotions that were originally 2 for $20. The other store we went to was Charlotte Russe where I bought jewelry (3 necklaces, 2 pair earrings and 4 buttons) for $26.00

We also visited Aerie which I would highly recommend for anyone with teen girls. They carry 32A bras! We didn't buy bras but I bought 8 pairs of underwear for $25. Very Cute!

We had one splurge yesterday and that was eating out at our favorite restaurant (NOT a CHAIN). It was 34.34 for 4 people including dessert (huge banana split, hot fudge sundae and coconut cream pie!)So, yes, we could have gone home to eat but it was SO YUMMY!

We had so much fun yesterday! Knowing I have a budget in place and knowing I am paying IN CASH for the first christmas EVER has helped ease my mind and make for a less stressful holiday season!


In other news, I am in the process of making 4 loaves of homemade bread. They are rising in the pans now. This is the first time I have tried making bread so it should be interesting to see the final results. So far it looks and smells like I think it should! I want to cut way back on processed foods and HIGH fructose corn syrup because I am hearing terrible things about it. I also need to lose weight!

Went grocery shopping for the week today and spent a total of 114.00. Pretty good. Will have to buy cat food later this week but I still feel happy about this. I have some new vegetarian recipes I am trying this week.

Have a good Sunday all!

I mentioned yesterday it looks like I've got around 300.00 extra in my checking than I thought...well so far today that is still holding.

I have gone over it at least 50 times this week. It looks like I may have subtracted a 300.00 withdrawal TWICE. But, like I said, I'm going to keep checking daily and visit the bank next week to make sure I really have this money. If I do I might transfer 50.00 to savings and use the rest toward credit cards.

We'll see.

Today I'm off to Old Navy and I have the AMEX card. Scary. Even though the AMEX isn't really credit because it HAS to be paid in full every month if FEELS like credit in my hand. I have a strict budget of 300.00 today. (That is how much extra my first December pay check will be)

So, I kind of feel like a "recovering" alcoholic entering a bar for the first time. Really, I do. But, Old Navy is having a big sale and my husband needs a new winter coat plus I'm going to pick up a present for my cousin.

After Old Navy we are going to Bath and Body and Victoria's Secret where I have coupons and a 10.00 gift card.

Well, I'm going to get ready now. Wish me luck!

I have to work 4 hours tonight (11p-3a) then I am OFF until Tuesday!! YAY!

This week has been so hectic and I am exhausted. Today I got 5 hours of sleep which is pretty good for this week.

My online banking is up and running! According to all my calculations I have around $300 more in checking than I thought. I don't trust it though. I plan on checking my account at least once a day so hopefully within the next week I will have everything straightened out.

I feel like I am handicapped when it comes to banking and anything money related. I'm going to keep at it though. It took me awhile to get into this mess though, so I can't expect everything to be fixed in one week.

I got paid today, $1230.97.
I put 1000.00 in checking
I will withdraw 200.00 in cash tomorrow and that will be for groceries, gas, misc. supplies for the next 7 days.

I am not sure what bills I will pay yet. I don't have many left for the month and I can't pay my mortgage until next Friday because it's more than $1000! I will probably pay for my car since it's due soon, gas, medical bill, cell and dish network. So then the only bill left will be mortgage which will get paid next week.

It looks like I will end November with appx:
100.00 savings 1
100.00 savings 2
35.00 savings 3

Pretty pathetic I know but I guess it is better than nothing plus I have not TOUCHED a credit card since the first week in September and all my bills are current. I have also managed an extra 1100.00 to bank of america, 75.00 hair cut and almost 100.00 in unexpected prescriptions.

Tonight I am taking C. to the movies with a friend. I am giving her $10. E. is going to an overnight party at a friend's house. Free!